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Ever since I started my survey asking all of you a few questions, I have realized that many of you want to take this whole “make money online” thing to the next level. Based on that, I am focusing my posts on helping to get folks to the next level.
My last post talked about being a T-Shaped online marketer. We talked about the skills we learn that make up our I-Shape…and the most important things that give us that profitable “T” shape.
Today I want to talk about another very important topic – resistance.
Resistance is a BIG deal when you are in charge of your own destiny when making money online.
For example, in this video I showed my own earnings after following pieces of a training program I really like. In that video I mentioned that those were my results. Naturally, no one can guarantee what your results will be – and one of the main reasons is that no one can guarantee how YOU handle resistance.
There are two types of resistance we have to deal with – internal and external.
Internal Resistance
Internal resistance is that self-imposed stuff –
and is a BIG reason why people don’t make it to the next level in this business.
Internal resistance is the things we tell ourselves to avoid doing something.
We internally tell ourselves that something is too hard, or we don’t have enough time…or the famous “I’ll do it later”.
Yes, these are excuses. Excuses hold us back more than anything else.
As you’ll hear in the video below:
“An excuse is all the separates us from who we are and who we want to be”
We all know where we are right now…and we know where we want to get to.
Internal resistance is what holds us back.
How well we deal with our own self-imposed internal resistance determines how much closer we get to where we want to be.
As you’ll hear, how we handle this type of internal self-sabotage is the difference between being an amateur and being a pro.
In fact, I wrote about my own struggle with this here at PotPieGirl.com back in 2007 (read: If Only I’d Get Out Of My Own Way)
External Resistance
The other type of resistance is external resistance.
External issues are things we really don’t have that much control over (ie, they’re not things we think to hold us back – they are things that just happen).
Sites break, plug ins break, things don’t work as expected….you know what I mean. The things that make us want to punch our fist through our monitors (been there, done that.. a LOT).
For many people, these things that go wrong are enough to flat-out stop them in their tracks. The others that get to the next level push through and go with it.
Is it easy? No, it’s not.
But it is the difference between here and where you want to be.
When I think back on my journey to the next level, I realize I have one (not so) charming quality that really helps me fight my own external resistance issues – I am super stubborn (yes, dear husband of mine, I just admitted it).
I am too stubborn to quit or to give up when things go wrong. I literally can’t rest until I figure it out.
I love in the following video when Tommy says that external resistance feels like the “universe HATES you” and won’t let you move forward.
Ever felt that way? I know I sure have… many, many times.
But then Tommy goes on to say that external resistance is “strongest when you’re on the cusp of doing something really great”.
I agree with him.
Also worth paying attention to in the video –
“Pros play hurt”- they “show up no matter what”.
When things break – we plow forward and make it work.
When we start hearing “you don’t have time” in our head – you make time.
When we tell ourselves we’ll do it later – we do it NOW.
That’s how we “turn Pro”.
That’s how we get to the next level.
Here’s the video – please watch it.
It’s only a little over 4 minutes, but it’s a powerful message. If you’re like me, you’ll want to bookmark it and watch it often – maybe every day.
Learning to deal with your resistance is KEY to taking it to the next level.
btw, Tommy Walker is AMAZING – you can follow him on Twitter here.
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when I was a child, I read one sentence which inspired me. No excuse if you want to do one thing. After that, when I want to delay doing things,no matter big or small, I read this sentence in my heart. Then I do not delay most of time. This is my experience which I think can apply to making blogs. Thank you for your writing this good article.
I personally have a problem with “active avoidance.” I know there are things that need to be done, but I always seem to find a way to put things off until later. The crazy thing is, I feel at my best when I’m productive and accomplishing tasks or action steps towards the achievement of my goals (go figure!).
One trick I’ve developed is the “10 minute rule.” If there is something that needs to be done (SEO work, exercise, whatever), and I just can’t seem to get motivated, I’ll commit myself to 10 minutes. If after 10 minutes of work I’m still in my “avoidance mode,” I’ll move on to something else. I’d say that 95% of the time though, I get over my resistance and really start to get into a groove.
What works for me is to show up in front of my computer and start doing what I already planned to do, whether I feel doing it or not. Just do it. The pace (slow/fast) doesn’t really matter. What matter most is to do it now and eventually all this actions will snowball and a goal has been achieved.
Luv, Anais
Hi Jennifer,
Long time no see. I don’t think you ever been on my blog, yet, but I come here once in a while.
Yes, resistance is a biggy for a lot of people, as a matter of fact, most of us. It’s something we always have to fight on a constant basis. Some people, however, have a huge resistance that they really need to work on “themselves”. unfortunately, it’s not something we can do for them.
Just yesterday, a writer friend of my was telling me that the ones who succeed, are the most aggressive ones, the ones who put all their might into succeeding at what they are doing. Being aggressive really helps to cut down the resistance.
Thanks for this great post and have a great day :)!
I just found out that this is called “cat waxing” in the writing world. The idea is that before you can do writing, or Internet Marketing, or whatever, you have perfectly good *other* things that have to be done, like cleaning up after breakfast, doing laundry, paying bills and balancing the checkbook, and so on. When everything else is polished, scrubbed, folded, sorted, filed, aligned, dusted, polished and shined to a mirror finish, you’re saved from actually producing anything by the realization that you forgot to wax the cat!
I’ve been waxing the cat for the last year and I don’t even have a cat…
I wasn’t familiar with Tommy Walker (I do know a Johhny Walker though, no relation I’m sure). Great stuff and inspirational.
Resistance, it seems, is NOT futile 😉
This could have not come at a better time. This is confirmation that I made a good choice although it was very difficult. I said no last night to playing in a band that would play a couple of nites a week and be an opening band for people like Joe Diffe, The Farm Band, Justin Moore, etc. This was at a dance club that seats about 900 people. Because I felt that the committment to do this would get in the way of me building an online business. Although I would have been making money doing this, I feel the money that it will cost me in the long run will be greater. Resistance keeping me from doing what I need to be doing as it relates to IM. Extremely tough Decision!
G’day Jennifer:
I can really relate to this post because I sometimes feel overwhelmed by both internal and external resistance. At times I feel like I’m swimming through molasses.
My current site is only my second effort, and the technical stumbling blocks keep mounting as I try new things, like putting images on my posts etc.
Finding excuses is the easiest part, there are always plenty of chores to do around the house, or maybe I’m just too old to be starting in internet marketing.
My way of overcoming this resistance is to ensure I do something on my site everyday, even if it’s only for ten minutes.
I have also become a member of a great forum which provides encouragement and advice on the techy side of things.
You’ve just gotta keeping plugging away and the aha! moment will come.
It is something great when we know what we are doing is on the track, but when the result is far away from our expectation it start to hold as again. It could be an internal resistance and this almost happen to newbies. It is so hard to do when we don’t have a community to communicate.
For me, the external resistance is easier to sole than internal one.
Yes for sure, so they say, that is what seperates the men from the boys (I am not sexist, just a saying) I agree I have failed twice now on the same site and have made changes and they started to work, I have folllowed a lot of good advice from members at WA and have got myself a site that is poised to make money….Have made more changes recently and they too have shown to be positive changes…although small changes..nothinig to write home about but still positive results. Makes me to want to go on, I stand now against getting more traffic…I am to stubborn to quit and my wife knows it, this site will go on to make $ and be a productive site…because it is almost there I can smell it…I will tweek it until I get it…never give up…
fishing
Hi Jennifer,
this is something that we’ve heard since we were children. you can come up with a million excuses as to why you can’t do something. bottom line is people who blame it on excuses simply do not want to succeed bad enough. I find it’s those who’s backs are against the wall are the ones that dig down and make something happen.
Hello Jennifer,
Got introduced to you from Micheal Ulhman and I am glad I did. You have made me take another look at myself from a different perspective and I like it. I am glad to have run itno you and I look forward to following you progress. Keep being you!
Thanks,
Shaefercd